Monday, July 13, 2009

Another post

I wanted to make another post that wasn't about being depressed. Haha. So here are a few random thoughts that I thought about blogging about but weren't really enough to blog about on there own:

1. This weekend, I hosted a shower for my future sister-in-law. It was so nice. I decided forever ago that there was no way I was going to be able to make the food, so I had it catered:) Good decision on my part. I was right. The food was superb thanks to Diane Conroy, and all I had to do was decorate and come up with activities. I didn't want to play games because they're kind of cheesy, so instead Kayla and I brought a bunch of our scrapbooking stuff and we made Liz a scrapbook that all she has to do is stick pictures in. I gave away prizes during the gift opening to whoevers gift Liz was opening when the timer went off. I didn't wrap the prizes either; I let people pick what they wanted. Anyway, thought you may want to steal some ideas. It was awesome!

Oh, and the room in the Bellaire library is a real steal!

2. Yesterday was the Italian picnic that my family oh so loves. We had a good time. My favorite part is the swimming, so I'm not sure why I don't spend more time at the pool.

This is totally random, but at one point when we were there I was using the restroom. I was done but was washing my hands and this mom comes in with I would say between a 6 and 8 year old girl. So she goes into the stall with the girl and is instructing her how to tuck her dress up so she doesn't pee on it. Weird.

3. Work. I'm really behind. Lot going on these next two weeks!
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Depression

So I struggle with depression. I'm not really sure to what degree because I've never gone to a mental health professional to be evaluated, but I know enough to know that they'd just prescribe me drugs anyway. I can remember being a teenager where I was at in my parents car the first time I recognized what was actually going on with me. It goes up and down, but when I'm down like this all you tend to remember are the downs, which makes me feel like I've been depressed for the past 12 years! Sigh.

So anyway, in the past I could usually pin-point what triggered my depression: break-ups, deaths, pregnancy and hormone changes. But this time it's befuddling me. My period has been all messed up which could be signaling some hormonal stuff going on, but I really think it's more than that.

Actually, I think it comes from trying to take on other people's problems instead of recognizing that God will in His own time and way.

I'm not going to go into all of the thoughts that race through my mind all day when I'm like this, but I will ask that you pray for me.

Right now I'm just trying to stay productive rather than laying around on the couch all day:(
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Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Making it Home

We're about three hours into our return trip. We drove 2.5 hours last night while the girls slept and now at 11:51am we're going to go the last five. Richard and I got four to five hours of sleep last night at a Super 8 where the really nice guy gave us the discount rate because it was late. $60 woo hoo! It was nice to get up this morning and take a shower.

It was hard saying good-bye to our friends. It was three years and two kids ago since we last saw them. We picked up where we left off:) The Stonebargers are dods teachers and still live in Yokosuka, Japan, so it was an incredible God-thing that we were free the same weekend they were going to be at the Ellis's. The Ellis's live in Chesapeake and are waiting on Chuck to finish his last year in the Navy, so they can retire from the military life. They are thinking about moving to Harrisbrug VA which is 2.5 hours closer to us:) or Atlanta, boo!

While it was slightly hard on my very introverted self to stay in a house with 12 people for 4 days, we had a great time. We really didn't do much. Cooked, ate, sang, and played Settlers of Catan which I think we got more people addicted too. We went to church on Sunday and the movies on Monday, saw Up (it was good). Yesterday we did take the girls to VA beach and the Virginia aquarium. It was the first time Riley saw the ocean and the first time that Evelyn remembers, so it was pretty cool. Of course, a first for Gigi but she definately won't remember. The girls loved it. Their favorite thing was sitting on the beach while the tide washed up on them. They sat there for an hour! We built a sand turtle since we didn't have anything to build a castle with. The aquarium was cool. Evelyn got to see sea turtles, sharks, and sea horses, some of her favorite characters from Nemo, so she was pretty excited!

Right now I have them counting cars. We just slowly worked our way through road construction. During which I unstrapped Riley and let her poop on the little potty! She decided to be potty trained just in time for the eight hour road trip! I'm not complaining though! Woo hoo for having only one in diapers!

Speaking of diapers and pooping, Gigi's eternal diaper rash has finally gone away! The secret: yogurt with probiotics (activia) and petrolium jelly. This confirms my ongoing suspicion that it was a yeast infection. The vaseline is the absolute best thing for holding moisture off the skin. I'm also grateful that I was able to cure it holistically; it means that the actually internal yeast overgrowth has been dealt with and not just the external symptoms. :)

Well, we're all about to pee ourselves, so I'm going to sign off!
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Friday, July 3, 2009

Getting Close

We're an hour away and it's 1 am. I have to admit that I'm pretty annoyed at richard! We do not travel well together. I try to do things to make it easier and it never is.

He just took ten minutes in the gas station. All three girls woke up and Evelyn peed herself! So now she's going to be riding for the next two hours in her own pee! Ah. I told myself that I'm writing it down that we are not going on vacation next year. At least not anywhere that is more than a 3 hour drive.

The girls did good the first three hours and after that it just didn't work. So we stopped at an outlet mall and fortunately there was a playground there. There was also a book store and we bought some cheap books to play with and they liked that. We stopped to eat dinner at Bob Evans and when we were getting ready to go Gigi had a poop explosion on my arm! Ah.

So we left there sometime before 10 and Richard had a headache so I told him that I would drive. Big mistake! I got to drive through the wonderful Washington DC bypasses at night on July 3. I kept thinking about how many drunk people were probably on the roads and how I was putting my children's lives in danger. Seriously, I was crying at one point when some jerk-off cut me off.

Pause. To :)

So since this has all been negative, I have just decided to say that the highlight of the road trip was driving through the central mountain region of Pa. It was so relaxing, majestic and simple all at once. I just love God's creation.

I do apologize for how awkwardly the last post ended. I was going to save it as a draft and accidentally hit send:) oh well. I guess it makes me more transparent when you get to read my 1:28 am unedited thoughts!

One hour and 42 minutes to go!
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From the Road

We've knocked about one hour off of our 8.5 hour trek to Virginia to see some old Navy friends. We're pretty excited about it. Of course, I already have to pee but I'm going to hold off telling Richard for a little while longer. Riley is sleeping, Gigi is being really good, and Evelyn is munching on some crackers. I feel bad for them; poor unsuspecting souls in regard to how long we're going to have them sitting in their car seats.

Ooo. Crossed what I believe is the Monhengehela river. Forgive the spelling. I mean who really knows how to spell that anyway.

So on to some more, what I think anyway, are more interesting thoughts. I have a crack where my pinky toe meets my foot, on both feet. They hurt. I think it's from doing a lot of yoga recently. I've been doing a lot of yoga because I'm trying to look half decent in my bridesmaid dress for my brother's wedding in two months. Sigh. I wouldn't care so much if all the other bridesmaids weren't a size 6 and under. But regardless, I needed to start getting back into yoga because I would like to eventually get my certification. It's part of my dream job - life coaching.

So it's been way less than two hours since we've left, and I can barely hold the pee! Maybe I'll look for the next starbucks!
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Mobile Blogging

Test three. Hoping this works:)
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Thursday, July 2, 2009

Virginia, Here We Come!

Richard, the girls, and I are about to head to Virginia to visit friends of ours that we haven't seen in three years! We're very excited! It's going to be awesome.

I just wanted to tell you all that :)

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Choice

I really shouldn't be blogging right now, but I've been contemplating this today, so I thought I would take the time to record some of my thoughts.

I think a general rule in our culture is that choice is a good thing when it comes to your preference, but a bad thing when it comes to choosing certain people over others.

One of the biggest frustrations I have in doing camp is the lack of follow-through I have with the campers. Most of them, I simply can not follow through with due to time constraints, other obligations, and distance. It's hard to simply let them go. But I do every year, trusting that what the campers experienced that week was what God intended. That God would nurture the seed planted. However, this year I felt compelled to go a little further, so I decided to choose two campers to stay in touch with and nurture. It really wasn't hard to choose two, but it was hard not to choose 5 or 6.

So why did I limit myself even when my heart is aching to do more? Because I know that in order to be an effective wife, mother, and youth leader, I have to limit my relationships with others. Ah. That's such a hard concept for some people to grasp, and I'm sure that if very many people read this blog, some would tear me apart. But it's the truth. I can burn myself out trying to be everything to everyone, or I can entrust most to Jesus and nurture the one's who have been given to me.

Isn't that favoritism? Nope. Favoritism is showing favor (or liking) to someone because we prefer their characteristics over someone elses. Favoritism is a trend in the OT (Abraham favored Isaac over Ishmael, Isaac favored Jacob over Esua, and Jacob favored Joseph and Benjamin over the others). It was a destructive trend that perpetuated much evil (and still does in the world today). It's sad and isn't what God desires of us.

But choosing is different. Choosing is recognizing who God placed in your life to nurture. The opposite of choosing isn't rejecting; it's not choosing. Calvins birthday is coming up and everyone is making a big deal of it - especially since his theology is making a comeback. I've been a Calvinist for as long as I've known what theology is, so I've experienced the questions. And the biggest beef with Calvinism is: a loving God would never choose some and reject others.

This misconception saddens me. (Please don't bash too hardly this analogy; it's not perfect but it's going to serve it's point). I've heard God compared to an awkward teenage boy at a dance. He goes around asking all the girls to dance, hoping some will say yes. Ah, this is so ridiculous. God is all powerful; He freaking created this entire world in 6 days! Six. The presence of His angels knocked people to their knees. He defeated Satan and conquered death! Seriously? God does not play the best odds game. He didn't extend His grace to everyone hoping some would go for it.

Some like to say, well, he extended a general invitation to everyone, but he really only asked the girls whom he knew would say yes. Nope. God goes right to the one's He called, and takes them by the hand, and walks them out onto that dance floor.

I think the biggest issue I have with my entire theology is that God is all powerful and if He saw fit to save the entire world, He could have. Unlike me, He isn't limited to relational and time constraints; He can be everything to everyone.

Okay, my budding theologian friends, thoughts?